We saved this story for late morning for reasons that’ll become very apparent.
Time’s new online publication Extra Crispy, launched Wednesday to set stomachs a-growl across the internet, no doubt. The vertical will showcase all that is trendy in the world of breakfasts and brunches, which means lots of content about bacon.
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As luck would have it, the publication is also hiring — and we’re not making this up — a “bacon critic.”
“Do you like eating strips of cured pork belly*, a.k.a. bacon? Do you have strong feelings about what makes good bacon good and bad bacon bad? Is “bad bacon” even a thing? Can you string words into sentences and paragraphs that convey information and entertain readers?,” asks the publication.
“If you answered “Yes!!!!!!!” to at least three of those, read on. Extra Crispy is seeking a freelance Bacon Critic to cover the bacon beat, spanning bacon’s role in food, drinks, and culture.”
And although the tone isn’t, the job is starkly serious.
Extra Crispy notes that the applicant can stay anywhere in the United States, but will “spend a three-month appointment researching, writing about, obsessing over, and critiquing bacon.”
TL;DR: the successful applicant will be on the hunt for the country’s best bacon. That’s a lot of hard, tiresome research.
If you happen to live in the US, or are willing to drop everything you’ve ever come to know in your country for the love of breakfast, you can read more about applying here.
And if you would excuse me, I’m off to destroy a sandwich.
Feature image: Ben Husmann via Flickr
