3D printed noPhone a modern-day pacifier for adults

What’s the best phone available on the market right now? That’s a debate that could rage on night and day between fans of rival factions. But nothing currently available can attest to the brilliance of the latest handset.

Introducing the noPhone, a 3D printed brick shaped like a smartphone.

There’s no way the NSA could access your data, because there is no data to access. There’s no way an angry partner could destroy it, flinging it headlong down a flight of stairs, because it’s invincible. There’s no way that dunking it in a swimming pool for weeks could damage the electronics, because there are none.

The creators have 3d-printed a genuinely fake phone. It has no mainboard, no electronics or capacitors, no silicon or SD card slots. No antennae, no battery, no 4K screen or 14MP camera. It doesn’t even have SMS or telephonic support. So what’s the point?

It’s the equivalent of a pacifier for adults that spend too much time crying and whining over their favourite toy, simulating the dimensions and weight of what we can only imagine is an iPhone.

In a bid to suppress the “unsettling feeling of flesh on flesh” when closing phoneless-hands, the creators devised a “surrogate tool designed to fulfil all smartphone-holding needs without preventing the user to engage in real life interactions.”

They’re rather serious about it all, too.

It’s finally here! The noPhone. A technology-free alternative to constant hand-to-phone contact. http://t.co/zs5K36tLyS

— Ben Langeveld (@mr_longchamp) July 29, 2014

 

Of course, there’s no conceivable reason to buy the noPhone but the conversations this concept provokes is perhaps worth its own weight in gold — which is not much, I imagine.

Does humankind spend too much time with technology, do you think the creators have gone a bit too far themselves? Let us know your feelings in the comments, because we are honestly dumbfounded.